Over the last two months I’ve gone through a lot of change. One of the biggest has been being laid off from my job and starting a new one. As many of you know, I loved my last job. I worked for a fast paced company in downtown Minneapolis. I loved the energy of the company and the hustle and bustle of the downtown atmosphere. I also loved the balance of living in the suburbs and working in the city. I had the city energy and pace during the day and the relaxation of our home in the burbs at night.
When I was laid off I ended up finding a new job working for a company that had a smaller branch office in the suburbs. I was elated at the opportunity to take this job…it was exactly in line with the direction I wanted to take my career. The office location was less than a 25 minute commute vs. the 60 minute commute I had working downtown (score!). The pace of the office was much different than my last job (like my boss entering my office at 3pm each Friday telling me to go home! What?!). I also had the opportunity to work from home one day a week (hello PJs!), and no one was really putting any weight on when I come and go. Sounds like perfection right? Well it was actually harder for me to adjust to than I thought.
I must say when I started this new job, as excited and grateful as I was for the opportunity, I went in with some judgement. I judged that this company didn’t have the energy and pace as my last. This office was quiet…my last office was loud and lively. All of the sudden I felt like the loudest person in the room instead of one that you could hardly hear among the group. I was working in an environment where I knew I had to change my style. It was still a relationship and collaborative focused company…I wouldn’t have accepted the job offer if it wasn’t…but it was less “Type A.”
That “Type A” is what I had morphed into over the past 15 plus years. It really started in college, where I learned that I was viewed as a more valuable person if I could master the art of ultra multitasking. Soon I was carrying a full course load, was the captain of the dance team, involved in two other student organizations, and working a part-time job to boot. I had to be extremely organized, super driven, and at times it was truly exhausting. Exhausting to the point where I showed up to campus one day wearing two different shoes…yep that happened!
Later that Type A carried over into my mid twenties, when I was trying to succeed in the “real world” for the first time and wanting to prove myself and make traction in my career. I also became Type A at home where I needed a clean house 24/7. I believe one friend actually told my husband and I that our home looked like a museum…
And when it finally came to trying to conceive a child don’t even get me started…I was charting, tracking, nit picking my diet, etc. and that ended up being the biggest learning experience of all. God was like “slow down sister and let me do my work.” He made me wait a long time and challenged my Type A personality more than ever before.
It’s funny how scary it can be to slow down. At first you sort of feel like you are missing out on something. Society is constantly telling us to move fast, be the best, be the most successful, etc., so we go, go, go, and then wonder why there are so many people today that have anxiety issues!
Aside from my new working environment, I’ve really needed to slow down for the last 14 months. Those are the 14 months that we’ve been blessed with our baby girl. I was forced to slow down from the very moment she was born because I had a c-section. There’s no moving fast after that surgery!
As parents we are forced to slow down in many ways…your baby needs your patience, they need you to rock them, snuggle them, read to them, and once they start walking, you need to slow down so they can keep up.
I’ve been slowing down a lot since I started this new job and I actually feel content for the first time in forever. I notice my surroundings more and take joy in the things I was too busy rushing to notice before. Life goes by too fast. I don’t want to miss out on the little things and I especially don’t want to miss out on the precious moments of my daughter growing up. I’m slowly adjusting to my new normal…and as I do I’ll continue to take in the joy of slowing down to enjoy each beautiful moment as a mom.
This is a life a little more simple, a little more relaxed, and I’m a better mom having slown down.